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How to Support Someone Who Is Grieving Effectively

Medical Review Approved with Dr. Faisal Tai, MD

Table of Contents

Grief is a complicated emotion, and the emotional pain of loss can be overwhelming. If you know someone who lost a person they deeply cared about, you have an opportunity to support them during this challenging time and even initiate their healing journey if their mental health has severely deteriorated.

In this article we will discuss how to help people begin to grieve and what steps you should take to make a meaningful and significant difference in the life of a person who lost their loved one.

Recognizing the Stages of Grief

You may have heard about the five stages of grief – denial, anger, bargaining, depression, and loss acceptance. There is a misconception that these stages always go in order which is not true. The grief process is not always linear, and you should not be surprised when a grieving individual who seemingly made peace with the loss during the stage of acceptance is suddenly aggressive and irritated. What you should know, however, is that all these reactions are normal even if some of the stages manifest in a way that looks bizarre from your point of view.

Creating a Safe and Supportive Environment

One of the main issues a grieving individual must deal with is a lack of understanding from their family and friends. It gets even worse if the relationship with the dead person was the reason for their inner circle to distance themselves or to express their disappointment in the choice of a partner or friend. 

When you are going through arguably the worst period in your life and you know you will get no compassion and empathy from others, it adds to your emotional pain and often leads to chronic depression and substance abuse.

Encouraging Emotional Expression Without Judgment

It is crucial to find a way to console a person with the right words. You may mean well but your emotional support might be expressed incorrectly especially if the individual is dealing with their grief in a way you would condemn. Be honest and gentle and do your best to avoid phrases that might make the person think you are judging them for their feelings or somehow believe they are at fault for their current emotional turmoil. 

Simple words like “I am sorry for your loss”, “I cannot imagine how hard it must be for you”, and “I am here for you if you need my help” remain the most helpful words for a person to hear at such a time.

Practical Ways to Support a Grieving Loved One

How to help people begin to grieve if you are a person of action? You should start by offering help that’s actually helpful instead of making empty promises and trying to find a way to dismiss the individual’s emotions:

Practical AdviceDescription
Rehearse Your DialoguesIf you know you may say the wrong thing or worry about a negative emotional response, it will help you to prepare a speech or come up with a few lines of dialogue to be able to navigate communication with the grieving individual. Think carefully about the words you will say to them and be ready to acknowledge their feelings
Practice Active ListeningYou may have your own ideas regarding the appropriate way to grieve and express emotions but your friend or family member is different from you so you should not assume that your suggestions are automatically correct and helpful for them. Give them space to ensure they get what they need
Take Care of ErrandsIt may be challenging for a grieving person to handle numerous obligations especially if they were arranging the funeral. Offer them to get groceries, call people on their behalf, or clean their apartment to make their life easier
Suggest TherapyProfessional help may not be the first solution that comes to the mind of a grieving person – they are so busy that they cannot take a break and analyze the impact of the death on their well-being. Research local mental health facilities and reach out to therapists you may have worked with in the past to come up with a specific plan of action

Promoting Healthy Coping Strategies

Here is what you can do to ensure a person you care about works through their grief in a healthy way:

AdviceDescription
Do Not Avoid the TopicIt is difficult to talk about the person who passed away but the suppression of feelings will only damage all people involved. Speak about the life of the individual and focus on positive memories that they would appreciate 
Do Not RushThis advice relates not only to grief but also to other decisions and choices a grieving individual might feel forced to make. Recommend them not to make drastic decisions such as leaving their job or moving to another city right away
Find Comfort in RitualsIf the person you care about wants to deal with the loss by celebrating birthdays and anniversaries, creating a grief shrine, or participating in religious ceremonies, give them a hand
Be an ExampleBy avoiding harmful habits and encouraging self-care, you can motivate your friend to do the same. This strategy is particularly useful when you were close to the person who passed away and you feel more resilient than others as you process your grief

Knowing When It’s Time to Seek Professional Help

While most people prefer to rely on themselves and their family and friends to cope with grief, there are certain signs that the grief is prolonged and complicated which means it is necessary to undergo therapy to move forward. Here is how you can tell if your relative or friend needs psychological guidance:

  • Their behavior changed drastically – for example, they self-isolate, behave unusually quietly, or exhibit self-destructive tendencies. 
  • They no longer eat or sleep the way they used to.
  • They drink or use drugs to suppress their emotional pain.
  • There are symptoms of specific mental health conditions such as depression.

Supporting Long-Term Healing

Although you may be wondering “How to help people begin to grieve?”, your support should not end after a few months after the funeral takes place. Unfortunately, grief might manifest years after the passing of the individual especially if the grieving person could not take time off to cope with the loss or they had to stay strong for the sake of their family. 

Long-term bereavement support can be achieved in therapy – if anything seems off in the behavior of the person you know well, tell them that they should consider grief counseling to restore a sense of security.

The Role of Counseling and Therapy in the Grief Process At Treat Mental Health

If grief gets too overwhelming and you can no longer recognize your family member or friend due to all the changes they went through no matter how long it has been since the loss, you should encourage them to prioritize their needs and undergo therapy. 

At Treat Mental Health we offer bereavement support to all individuals who struggle to move on after the death of someone they loved very much – contact us today, learn why ongoing support matters months after the loss, and let us find a way to help you overcome your grief.

FAQs

What are effective coping strategies for navigating the stages of grief and fostering emotional support in support groups?

Admitting the impact of the loss, remembering you are not alone, talking about happy memories you have shared with the person, and preparing yourself to feel sad, angry, and confused since these are all natural emotions are the best ways to deal with grief as you attend group therapy.

How does counseling or therapy contribute to a healthy grieving process and promote acceptance and healing?

Grief counseling is an excellent idea for a person who struggles with grief and loss. They can get a fresh perspective from an impartial individual, learn and practice healthy coping mechanisms, and prevent mental health issues that often start as a result of a major loss or trauma.

What self-care resources are essential for those seeking emotional support and guidance during the grieving process?

Apart from self-soothing techniques you can master under the guidance of a therapist, you can rely on self-help books that help readers navigate grief and loss, call hotlines to talk to mental health professionals, and dedicate time to process your emotions and relax with the help of mindfulness practices.

How can support groups aid in the stages of grief and provide a foundation for acceptance and healing?

Group therapy can be a validating environment a grieving person is looking for – they will be surrounded by people who also lost someone so they can learn from others’ mistakes and successes, speak about their emotions candidly, and forge connections to prevent social isolation.

What role do counseling and therapy play in developing coping strategies and ensuring a healthy grieving process?

Bereavement therapy can ensure a person is given time and space to process their loss. The patient is able to speak up about their worries and concerns they cannot share with other people, stay away from self-destructive behavior, and feel less alone especially if they have no one to trust but their therapist.

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Medical Disclaimer

Treat Mental Health is committed to providing accurate, fact-based information to support individuals facing mental health challenges. Our content is carefully researched, cited, and reviewed by licensed medical professionals to ensure reliability. However, the information provided on our website is for informational purposes only and is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always seek guidance from a physician or qualified healthcare provider regarding any medical concerns or treatment decisions.

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